parenting blog

This list is from the "Discipline" chapter in Natural Family Living by Peggy O'Mara.

• Use positive reinforcement.
• Create a positive environment.
• Say yes as much as possible.
• Say no for the important things.
• Use natural consequences.
• Use logical consequences.
• Use restitution.
• Leave it up to your child.
• Compromise.
• State your expectations, and get out of the way.
• Give specific instructions.
• Give a reason.
• Offer help.
• Give a choice.
• Redirect your child.
• Remove your child.
• Make positive statements.
• Give in occasionally.
• Give your child time to agree.
• Simply insist. [instead of asking "Okay?" constantly]
• Make rules.
• Ignore some behavior.
• Avoid nagging and threats.
• Distract your child.
• Use humor.
• Make it a game.
• Be willing to admit your mistakes.
• Stop and think before you act.
• Don't make a big fuss over little things.
• Stick to routines.
• Don't hurry your children too much.
• Get to the root of the problem.
• Correct one behavior at a time.
• Give yourselves time.
• Use the golden rule.
• Model appropriate behavior.
• Think of your child as an equal.
• Always keep your love for your child in mind.

I do not agree with everything on this list or in the book, but it seems good to keep a list like this available. Earlier in the chapter, where the author describes each one of these alternatives a little, she states:

"Look over this list of alternatives to punishment. Not all of them will work for you -- some may be more appropriate for certain ages or situations; some may even be contradictory. The point is to have a repertoire of approaches to draw from in any given situation."

This simple list is then reprinted at the end of the chapter.

Om